Sunday, March 2, 2008

I'm staring at the asphalt wondering what's buried underneath, where i am - postal service

I'm in australia. and its amazing. and im so happy. i've made so many friends and i only miss a few things back home. The two things i cant live without are bailey and josh. But everytime i think about going home, for uni, for anything i push it out my head.
And a major reason i dont want to go home is because my family is so fucked up right now. You might think i would want to be home to be there for them. I only care about comforting my father really, who makes me feel so bad for having a part on his lonliness right now. My dad who has never shown emotion, never told me about his feelings, never really communicated the deeper issues is telling me everything. He's telling me how he's having anxiety attacks, missing meals, and feeling overwhelming depressed. And i'm halfway across the world, and i know that im one of his best friends.
My mom broke up with my dad again. I really thought it was another redundant cry for attention. It's fucking different this time, and really really bad.
I'm literally torn apart right now. Fuck.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

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the Albino Bowler said...

I've been following your blog and figured I'd say hello.
Among other things, we share an interest in Australia. I think you could relate to the kangaroo rodeo I've been working on.

Matt

P.S. What is your favorite thing about Australia?